How Can You Find Your Purpose In Hospitality?

Kieron Bailey
00:00:00.160 - 00:00:40.600
If I could take you back to your first question. Your first question was about age in hospitality and it's yes, there is a challenge for 50 year old gray bearded fellas like me.

Of course that's just a fact but actually the Gen Z's and Gen Alphas coming through, they've got a real challenge. That's not great. So now she's at a point where she fundamentally, the way she talks to herself, her self talk is just.

It was devastating to hear, if I'm honest with you. She referred to herself as being lazy, useless, stupid, dumb, no purp. It caused me pain. It caused me pain.

And I know full well that we all have that moment.

Timothy R Andrews
00:00:46.060 - 00:01:41.688
Welcome to season five, episode two of Talking Hospitality Getting older. If we're lucky, it will happen to every one of us. But as we age we what happens and how do we navigate those changes?

In today's episode we ask inspirational guest Kieron Bailey his take on getting older, what it means to him. And he offers some sound advice for all of those who are considered to be part of the older generation in hospitality.

I'm joined in today's episode by co host Joe McDonnell.

A big shout out to our returning partners designers Graphic Kitchen and our new partners Job Board Leisurejobs for both of them supporting Talking Hospitality this season, without whom this season would not have taken place. Thank you very much. Have it. Enjoy the episode. Kieran, welcome to Talking Hospitality. Thanks for coming on the show.

Kieron Bailey
00:01:41.824 - 00:01:43.180
My absolute pleasure.

Timothy R Andrews
00:01:43.680 - 00:02:02.218
So we're talking about getting older and hospitality and what that looks like and you are a great advocate on LinkedIn.

You've been quite prolific particularly, particularly on the social medias and LinkedIn talking about your experience of hitting a certain age and what that like and your perception and other people's perception about that. Would you like to talk a little bit about that?

Kieron Bailey
00:02:02.354 - 00:03:02.738
Yeah, yeah, for sure. I mean it's.

I basically I was, I was 50 this year and I've never really considered age as being a thing because I'm a man who at 50, who dresses like he did when he was 25 and hasn't really progressed too much beyond that point, to be honest with you. But my dad died when he was 52 and I'll be honest, we're very different people me. And my daddy was a bit of a drinker. He loved to gamble.

He smoked like an absolute chimney. The smell that reminds me of him is a cigar. So there's that, those things that kind of.

We had a very different life but he died at 52 and you kind of that stuff gets into your head and then I start to kind of think about that a little bit and start to pay attention to who else is kind of having these conversations and who else is kind of feeling this.

And weirdly, there's a lot of people who are feeling it, you know, and I think I was talking to a guy in the, in the marketing world who is being passed over for jobs because he's old, because he's seen as being kind of decrepit and kind of not on point and not, not aware of what' cool and what's hip. So yeah, he actually used the word hip. And I'll be honest, man, you're not helping yourself using the word. Just stop.

Timothy R Andrews
00:03:02.794 - 00:03:03.746
Because it's probably broken.

Kieron Bailey
00:03:03.778 - 00:06:01.356
At his age, I think he might be, to be honest. It's just easily. He did have a little tumble.

But yeah, there's so many people kind of sitting in this world of kind of getting to this point of age and just starting to question what they, what their place is in the world.

And I think the world is changing massively when it comes to careers and we're in this place of chapters in books and yeah, man, the chapters, when you get to our point in life, they're just, just. I'm looking for something deeper within them, to be honest. I'm looking for a deeper connection.

I think one of the things that that age will help and give you in that experience is how to deepen those connections in a really positive and constructive way that maybe some of our younger friends. Joe, I'm not talking about anybody else, but you maybe, maybe just don't have quite that ability to, to have the connection.

Of course you do, Joe, I'm joking. But there's so many people out there who are really struggling now.

And I think I was, I saw last week the Cathode du Bar was posting something about the ide kind of 50 year olds going into interviews and the struggles and challenges that they're facing in there and the questions that they're being asked and even the questions that people are being asked in this environment and the way that we're looked at, it's just like you're old and you're past it and genuinely, I mean, I'm a long way from old and past it, personally speaking. I've got a long way to go and all of the people that I speak to have a lot of energy. They're ready to roll.

They know they've got a huge amount of experience and they want to share it with the world. So We've got to open up this mindset that actually there's a real value to the experience.

And then kind of without going on a rant, my local coffee shop at the train station that I travel from pretty much three times a week, there's a lady there, she must be sort of 67, I think she said she's amazing. Like she's one of these people who just, she gets on with it, she gets the job done. She multitasks like an absolute machine.

She starts thinking about kind of there's no stress, there's no panic, she just gets it done.

And then she was telling me that actually kind of they keep sending her these young kids who just don't know the railbow and she's having to kind of try and teach them the basics of kind of decision making in this point in life. And kind of critical thinking is a real thing for me without generation of people but they just don't have these skills.

And she is kind of looked down upon kind of from her senior leadership a little bit because well, she's old and she's slow and she might need a bit more time off. But the reality is she runs that place like an absolute machine, single handedly.

This is a busy train station going into London but she never stops and she's always got it moving. This place has never run out of anything, it's never out of stock of anything. And she remembers what I want to drink.

She's got my cup of tea on the counter waiting for me as I walk up to the counter. I mean she's lucky I generally am wearing a bright yellow baseball cap so kind of you'll see me from a distance. But. So that gives her an indicator.

But the fact is she's doing that, she's paying attention to that and putting it into play. And it bothers me a little bit that we've got people in the workplace who don't feel valued when actually they're adding in tremendous value 100%.

Timothy R Andrews
00:06:01.428 - 00:07:06.572
I mean it's.

You see that in hotels at the moment that we work, not necessarily specifically the one I'm working in, still want my job, but the hotels that some of our competitors as well, we're finding in the market, particularly over the last year or so where a lot of people were hired after lockdown, brought in often very inexperienced and we don't have the older generation that's left, don't want to come back into hospitality. We haven't made it appealing to them.

And what means is we've promoted a Lot of people that don't have the experience to deliver to high standards or to the expectations of the customers. And there's been no one to show them. And that is because we have looked after or nurtured some of the older people.

And so it's really important that we really respond within as an industry to, and reach out to 50 pluses, because these are the guys that can teach the younger people how to do it and a much quicker way and stop them making the mistakes that they made.

Kieron Bailey
00:07:06.756 - 00:07:13.900
It's true we must do multitasking, but you get time, get to our point in life. And I was, I was chatting with Matt Grimshaw from UDA last week.

Timothy R Andrews
00:07:13.940 - 00:07:14.156
Yeah.

Kieron Bailey
00:07:14.188 - 00:07:55.362
And we were talking about the. He was, he was talking about kind of legacy and kind of, without ever mentioning legacy, we were talking about legacy.

And I said, look, I don't have kids, so there's a whole load of stuff that's in my head that I've learned over the years that I just want to just pass on to as many people as possible as effectively as possible. And I think kind of being able to trust and be able to utilize that effectively.

The businesses that embrace that, the businesses that say, yes, absolutely, there are lots of people like here and like Tim who've got loads of experience, loads of knowledge and actually I just want to bring them on board and I want to just take everything that I can from them. That's all right because I'm here to give it, you know, kind of, and I know you are too. It's kind of.

We believe in paying it forward to that next generation of people.

Timothy R Andrews
00:07:55.546 - 00:08:56.790
I was reading a book the other day.

It was talking about tech firms and how when there was the big growth in tech firms and even now everyone thinks young people, they're very creative, let's go, let's hire them.

And what the reason why a lot of them fail is because they haven't got the diversity of older people to show them how to run a business, how to budget, how to, you know, keep a lid on things, how to market effectively, how to prioritize is a massive thing. And a reason why a lot of these tech companies are failing is because they haven't got the experience on the board.

And it's staggering amount of statistics. I'll look it up and put them in the details on the website talkinghospitality.com and you can read more about that.

But yeah, it is 100% something that I think about as well now that I've got a team that's Younger than me. I want them to grow because I will leave, God willing, I will leave the industry happy and well before they will, and they will continue that legacy.

Kieron Bailey
00:09:02.260 - 00:09:33.940
How are you? Because there's a question about how we do this as well.

I think sometimes as older people, we've got a responsibility to really think about how we're going to pass information through without being a patronizing numpty. I've been that patronizing numpty in the past who just like, oh, I've got all the information, honestly, I'm godlike here.

I'm an omnipotent being who's got all of the knowledge. And actually I'm not, obviously.

So I think we've got a responsibility to think about how we pass that through and how we kind of have those conversations and creates that kind of comfortable place. What. What are you doing within your team to kind of. To do that, to make that happen?

Timothy R Andrews
00:09:34.560 - 00:10:47.048
I think the main thing is I'm trying to empower them to make the decisions. So you. I listen to them, then normally it's, what do you think you should do? You do have, you know, and try.

Encourage them to have the knowledge there. And if they try and they don't get it, then I'll pass it on, maybe after the second or third attempt.

But I don't tend to, unless it's a very urgent or sticky situation, then I would. I kind of. I spend the time to go, let's try and draw it out of them, because then they remember because they feel like they've made the decision.

Sometimes the questions are very guiding, obviously, because we want them to get there, but questions, it's just about getting them to that space where they think they've understood it. And because they think they've understood it, they probably have. It's just getting them to do it. So empowerment for me. And it's.

I know it's a bit of a cliched word, but it is actually so important because the ideal is at some point that I'm no longer required in that business because these guys have stepped up to the plate, got promoted, and I can move on and they can move on with their careers as well. I'm not a protective manager in any sense. Like, I don't go because my job's under threat. My job is.

Kieron Bailey
00:10:47.104 - 00:10:47.656
You want.

Timothy R Andrews
00:10:47.728 - 00:10:54.000
One of my team has openly said he wants my job, and I'm very happy to train him up to that.

Kieron Bailey
00:10:54.540 - 00:12:20.580
So I love that.

One of the things I talk about a lot and I do leadership training for various different People I was with the Imperial Hotel Group for the last six months. Lovely people. They were at the HR and Hospitality Awards last night. I don't know if they won. Hope they did because they're doing amazing work.

They're building a real culture of learning, which I think is incredible, to be honest with you.

But one of the things I talk about in leadership is kind of David Marquette's pushing authority to information and it's intent based leadership fundamentally. And that's what you're just describing.

It's about kind of giving, giving the people in the position at the front line the opportunity to resolve the problem and bring the solution first and accept the fact that occasionally they're going to make mistakes. We all do. And thinking about managing our response to that, do we respond or do we react?

You know, kind of reaction comes from the emotional, just like, you've got to do better, just do better, get it right, do first. Whereas a response is just like, hey man, it's, it's okay, it's okay. We don't, we're not doing brain surgery.

No one's going to die here, so we're all okay, is the honest answer. And I love that that's kind of part of the way you operate your team and your business.

I think having spent a little bit of time in your business strolling the, the corridors, you could sense that, to be honest with you, you could sense that feeling, that kind of, everybody that we engage with kind of had that sense, had that kind of friendliness, that openness that just told me that they feel, they feel emboldened, they feel empowered. And for me that's, that's really key to be fair. Empowerment. You're right, it's a proper buzzword, isn't it?

But talking about it and doing it are two very different things.

Timothy R Andrews
00:12:27.460 - 00:13:00.620
So one of the things that I've noticed where I've never, not really seen it before is the gap in language between say Gen Z's and sort of 50 year olds. And I feel very much there is a very different kind of language going on and I think there's a miscommunication.

My question to you is how do you, how do we, how do you, how would you manage that situation? Or how do you manage that situation?

Kieron Bailey
00:13:01.040 - 00:16:50.558
So it's a funny one. I was, I was last week, one of my oldest friends is a mentee. He was delivering a session.

So he's, he's a feedback coach and he, at 40 years of age, he took up jiu jitsu, which just makes perfect sense to me, I'll be honest with you, does it.

He got injured a lot for the first year, but one of the things that he's found is parents don't have the strongest skills in how to deliver feedback to their children in a, in a kind of post competition and post competitive world, or even a post training world.

And so he's designed this program that kind of helps parents to think about the language that they're going to use when they're communicating with their kids. And I was sitting there listening to, just thinking, this is, this is actually how we operate, certainly how I operate within hospitality.

You've kind of, you've got to go to them where they are, you've got to meet them where they are. So he gave a really good example of his, of his youngest son. He's like 13. He loves Lara Croft, this kid.

He loves Lara Croft and everything is about kind of Croft ability. So he's talking about kind of what, what does Laura do? How does Laura approach life? And Raph's like, listen to this.

And he's thinking, okay, well, I'm going to start to use that language when I'm communicating with Xavier because I want him to connect with the point that I'm making. So he's talking about kind of, he's talking about how you approach challenges and he's using kind of Lara's language.

He's talking about when he wants to make a point, he just uses the word craftability. He kind of, how does that rate on the craftability scale?

And Xavier knows straight away what he's talking about and the point that he's trying to make. So instantly he's connected to the, to that kind of solution. That's what we need to do in our working world.

Maybe we're not going to talk about Lara Croft because maybe that's not the thing that everybody's into. I mean, I'll be honest with you, when I was sort of 17, I enjoyed Lara on PlayStation. She made me happy. That was a long while ago.

And obviously Angeline Jolie in the film did not. It's not made me sad at all, let's be real. But today that's not going to connect with the average person.

So we've got to think about kind of where are they at right now? And I think one of the things that we have to look at is kind of cultural touch points. What's happening musically?

You know, kind of my musical tastes, if I'm honest, are quite extreme. To some people, I quite. I like big guitars. I Like big noise, big beats, big everything. I want noise. I want to feel it. I want that carnage in my mind.

I want that carnage to want to feel it. But not everybody's there. So I've got to think about kind of, right, if I'm using a musical reference to kind of to connect a point, what's.

What's the moment for these people I'm working with right now? Then I've got to listen to my people to understand what motivates them and what's making them smile.

I've got to think about, are they paying attention to the Bear right now? Is the bear something that's really high up in their list of things, of talking points, water cooler moments?

I guess if it is, then I'm going to use elements of that to connect my point, using that show to say, right, so in this moment, series two, episode seven, Forks is my go to episode on Bear. It just brings me joy, to be honest.

It's that moment if I want to get somebody to understand really kind of how to understand what is their place in the world, what is their thing to do in the world, what is their special talent, what is their special skill.

I'm going to take you back to series two, episode seven, because that moment where Richie has his epiphany and understands service and understands what he is here to do, it's perfect to be able to make that point. Now that's great because I love that.

But if everyone else isn't watching it, well, then I'm just talking into thin air because I like to sound at my own voice.

But I've got to be thinking about what are the reference points for them and using their language, meeting them where they are and then drawing them to where I want them to be. That is such a kind of. It takes work, to be honest with you, because you've got to be paying attention.

You've got to be kind of connected to your people and to what's really important to them.

And if you're not, you're going to fall short and you're going to end up A, looking foolish and B, like you're really not paying attention, which then straight away damages that credibility and that connection that you've got with them already. That's an issue, I think as well.

Joe McDonnell
00:16:50.614 - 00:18:11.478
Like in terms of language use, when you've got the generational differences, at least in my own experience, is very much the younger somebody is, the more likely that they're going to struggle to separate them from their performance and their role.

Because, and I think it's maybe to do with self esteem, maybe it's to do with experience, but also it's just as you get older, you realize you wear many hats in life and that's only getting increasingly more true.

Older people in roles who are more experienced, they're much better at sort of separating and said, oh, this isn't good enough or this isn't where it needs to be, or we need to make improvements.

I think generally tend to be better at stepping back and saying, okay, let's take that at face value as opposed to the when if somebody hears a bit of criticism or somebody hears a bit of feedback redirection and it's all of a sudden their world is crumbling down just like, hang on, I'm a great bartender. Why do you think I'm not a good person? So it's like, you can't.

I'm not advocating being a lazy coach or a lazy manager or a lazy leader, but like, you know, that sort of step of being very clear and saying, we're going to talk about your performance here, we're not going to talk about you as a person. I think I've seen a lot of times where that friction's come in intergenerationally.

Kieron Bailey
00:18:11.654 - 00:20:08.750
Yeah. I think you're talking about criticizing the competence, not the personality. And I think that's getting.

That separation between those two things is so important because it's really easy to feel like you're having a pop at me right now.

And as soon as I feel like you're having a pop, all of a sudden I move into that kind of reaction mode, which is the emotional feeling that's actually started defense starts to kick in and I start to think, rather than listening to you and sort of taking it on board, I'm starting to think about what I'm going to say back to you to sort of argue your point against it, because I probably don't see that actually.

Yes, I talk biblically last week and I think one of the things, one of the things we do really well, I think within, certainly within hospitality, is we're pretty good at giving feedback, if I'm honest with you. We're pretty terrible, though, at preparing people to receive feedback.

I don't think we're really good at actually kind of laying down the stones to say, actually, here are the foundations to what receiving feedback is going to feel like sometimes. Sometimes it's going to be nice, sometimes it's going to be uncomfortable.

And here's some tools for you to be able to manage that effectively and I think that's probably one of the biggest challenges that we have in the industry, I think, to be honest with you, because I think if we could say to people, get them to that point where receiving feedback is the most natural thing in the world and instantly it's just, it's taken with trust, it's taken with positivity, it's taken with the fact that yes, it might not feel good right now, but I'm going to listen to what you tell me, I'm going to take it on board, I'm going to do something with it and then I'm going to feel amazing.

If we don't prepare people to kind of, to start to feel like that and give them the tools, how can we really expect them to take that feedback particularly well, you know, and think we've spent so long teaching people how to deliver feedback, you know, it's not about the perfect moment, it's not about the perfect place.

It can be feedback in that moment of time, on shift, on the bar, it can be anything or it can be something more in depth, but we're not preparing our teams to receive it effectively. We may as well just be whistling into the wind. And that makes no sense to me at all.

Timothy R Andrews
00:20:08.870 - 00:21:08.120
I think the biggest thing is people fear of confrontation. They fear that it's going to be confrontational from both sides.

And I think it's up to the person giving that feedback to not view it as confrontational and view it as we need to have a conversation with this person. Sometimes it's gonna, you're gonna have stuff where it's not gonna go that smoothly. That is life.

But if you approach it with the right mindset, I've pretty much found 90, 99 of the time there's no issue. It's not an issue because I'm already depowering the situation in my own head.

So I'm not getting so, so stressed about it because it's like we've got to have this conversation. It's not about fight, it's not like Joe said, it's not about making it personal.

Is these are the issues that need to be addressed and it's just keeping it factual whilst at the same time, like you say, making clear this is not a personal thing against you.

Kieron Bailey
00:21:08.900 - 00:25:41.840
So if I could do it, if I could take you back to your first question, your first question was about age in hospitality. And it's yes, there is a challenge for 50 year old, gray bearded fellas like me. Of course that's just a fact.

But actually the, the Gen Zs and Gen Alphas coming through.

They've got a real challenge because I was sitting, sitting, having, having lunch with a couple of 17, 18 year olds and listening to the way that they kind of referred to themselves and listen to the way they talked about themselves made me sad, really made me sad in that moment. So what the young lady was just, she, she's had some tough times, you know, she's kind of, she suffers with chronic fatigue.

She had a pretty terrible time at college and it's, that was all happening during COVID so that's not great.

So now she's at a point where she just, she fundamentally, she, the way she talked to herself, her self talk is just, it was devastating to hear, if I'm honest with you. She referred to herself as being lazy, useless, stupid, dumb, no purpose. And that was in about 15 minutes of conversation.

And I was just sitting there just going, oh my Jesus. It caused me pain, it caused me pain. And I know full well that we all have that moment.

No self talk is just, we are crueler to ourselves than anybody else ever could be and we give ourselves permission to do that and it will never not confuse me as to why we do that. And I'm sitting there talking, talking to this young girl and her boyfriend.

He's like 18 and he's an apprentice in the brakes brick in the building industry. And brick building, is that even a thing? He's a joiner, that's what he is. He's a useful little fella.

And he was kind of going down the same sort of route and, and it struck me that these two kids are kind of having this, this thought process. The way they kind of communicating to themselves, it was brutal.

And in the end I had to just sit down, say I got the, the server to bring me some paper.

And I said now just do me a favor and spend just five minutes and just write down all of those things, all of those ways and those words you use to describe yourself, write them down for me, please. And they said they, they sat in peace and they were writing.

And as they were writing you could see the kind of, they were, they were upset with what they were, what they were putting down on paper. And then I said, right now read, particularly young girl. I said read this out to me and tell me those things, say them to me.

And she's kind of looking at me and she was like, okay, it's a bit weird. I was like, dirt it, let's just do it. Entertain the old man, you know what I mean? Let's just make it happy.

And she got about three, three points into her list and stopped and she said, I can't say these things to you. I can't say these words to you. I just, I don't want to make you feel like that. I don't want to make you feel sad. I don't want to make you feel upset.

I want to, I don't want you to hear these words. And I was like, but you're really comfortable to say them to yourself.

All that you've literally anything the first four points on there, you've literally said in the last 15 minutes that for me that's, that's such a moment because A, she's in tears as we're having this conversation and she's like, I really don't want to make you feel this way. I don't want to make you feel horrendous. I was like, but we've got, you've got to control kind of how you're talking to yourself.

You've got to think about who's who. Who are you giving permission? Why are you giving your brain permission to be this brutal to you?

So the people who are kind of up at my end of the scale who are struggling and are kind of having that same self talk because people are kind of looking at them like they're past it and they don't know, they don't know what's cool, they don't know what's on point. The other people at the other end of the scale are having a pretty similar issue, to be honest with you.

So it's kind of, I'd love to say that as kind of middle aged 50 year olds that we're quite unique in our challenges, but we're really not. We're really not.

And I think actually kind of for me that was quite kind of a pivotal moment because it kind of, it took me out myself a little bit because I've had a, I've had a crap year this year. You know, Tim, it's not been the most fun in the world. Like I've been in this kind of fit of self loathing.

You know, somebody said to me at the casual dining last week, I haven't seen you in ages. I was like, I've been hibernating. I've been hibernating from the world. And that's because I didn't want to be around people.

Like I must have seen around 10 different people since February, you know. And Joe, we talked about service, you know, in February service. I Was like, hey, everyone's best friend. Gonna be nice, gonna be amazing.

Pretty much straight after that, two weeks after that, I was like, time for hibernation. Move away from the world. Don't want to be near anybody. I've seen about 10 people in that time since then, which anybody who knows me knows.

That's really not in character, to be honest with you, because I love a chat on the whole.

Timothy R Andrews
00:25:43.140 - 00:25:49.660
I am glad. Sorry. I am glad you're out of hibernation now, Kieran. So welcome back, indeed.

Kieron Bailey
00:25:49.740 - 00:25:52.124
I should have shaved it like a bear coming out of hibernation.

Timothy R Andrews
00:25:52.172 - 00:25:58.838
But no, the sun is shining, so there is not enough Kieran in the world. So it's good to have you back.

Kieron Bailey
00:25:58.894 - 00:26:00.050
I appreciate that.

Timothy R Andrews
00:26:06.270 - 00:26:11.558
So, in closing, Jo, is there one thing you want to ask before I ask final question?

Joe McDonnell
00:26:11.694 - 00:26:41.292
Actually, I do. Yeah. When you were talking then, Kieran, you had. You mentioned something about mindset and it changing it as you get older.

And I wonder if you could maybe speak to how that. How it shifted in your life and what you could maybe offer to someone, say, my age in the. In between the Gen Z. I think for me, I.

Kieron Bailey
00:26:41.476 - 00:26:49.472
There was a spell, certainly when I was probably between 30 and 40, where I felt I had to know everything and I had to be the font of all knowledge. And.

Joe McDonnell
00:26:49.656 - 00:26:50.800
Yeah, I'm right there.

Kieron Bailey
00:26:50.920 - 00:29:50.260
Yeah, I made stuff up. Like, literally, I'd make stuff up and just say it with utter confidence and utter conviction and anybody would believe me. There's some.

There's some people walking around the world right now believing stuff that is absolutely untrue because I said it with absolute passion and conviction. And they're like, well, that means Kieran normally talks then, so he must be. He must be talking absolute sense.

But now it's kind of getting comfortable with the fact that you don't know everything and you don't have to know everything. Christ, it's exhausting trying to know everything. It kind of.

You just break yourself if you go down that road, but accept the fact that there is knowledge out there that's waiting to be found. But really, for me, I think it was about understanding, actually. I can kind of create a network of people who. I don't have to know the answer.

I just have to know somebody who does know the answer. And I'm incredibly lucky that I have a network that is vast, that I can call upon for pretty much anything, any answer to any question.

Somebody asked me randomly, kind of, where can I get tote bags printed? I can connect them to somebody. Somebody asked Me, who, who can talk to me about kind of interior design in my restaurant, Sustainable design.

I'll connect them to David Jennery. There's just. There's a. There's a list of people.

But getting comfortable with the fact that I don't have to know everything, I just have to know as many people as possible. And then really to do that, I absolutely had to shift my mindset when it came around to networking because I was horrendous. I was awful at it.

When I was probably about 30, like I would literally somebody. I remember kind of. So When I was 30, I was working for Wagamama and I was a pretty good restaurant manager. I kind of had three sites, really kind of.

I loved it, to be fair, but every time I was invited out to come and go to one of their networking events or go to a kind of go to go meet kind of my peers, I would just find it really uncomfortable. And I was just like, ah. I always found a reason not to do it because I just didn't know.

For me, it felt like a really weird space to go and say, I'm gonna. Gonna go and spend time talking about myself. But actually kind of.

I read a book, I can't remember which one it was, but I read a book about the idea of networking and kind of understood very quickly that just go and ask loads of questions of people. Go and ask lots and lots of questions. Be comfortable with silence, your own silence, which for me is not the easiest thing in the world.

I'll be honest with you. Still working on that one. But letting people just talk about themselves and just.

And clock in that info and then just being ready to really share it and pay it forward to as many people as possible. That for me was probably the biggest one, I think. Yeah, man, life's. Life's hard as well.

Just accept that life's hard and sometimes stuff's going to get put in your plate and in the moment you're going to feel like you can't handle it. It's too much. And you question why, why it's been thrust upon you. But it's there for a reason. And I said earlier, it's been a hard year this year.

I've learned so much.

However, things don't always go to plan and just accepting the fact that sometimes stuff goes wrong and you're going to flex and you're going to learn, you can take that as an opportunity, then roll with it and just see where it takes you. Yeah, they're probably the kind of the two biggest Ones. Jo, I don't know if that's going to help you to be fair, mate, but just.

Timothy R Andrews
00:29:55.760 - 00:29:59.496
In closing, tell me about People On Purpose.

Kieron Bailey
00:29:59.688 - 00:31:35.310
Yeah, I mean, People On Purpose was born from the last six months. It was for the last four months. I felt devoid of purpose. I didn't have a clue what I was going to do next.

And I was kicking myself around a room in quiet hibernation, happily.

One of the people that I did go and spend some time with, Michael from Hospitality Mavericks, we sat in the Hamyard Hotel drinking tea as civilized people do. If you haven't been to the Hamyard Hotel for a cup of tea, really do it. Treat yourself. It's a joy. And.

And Michael sat and listened to me talk for about an hour and a half and by the end of it he could have literally, it felt like he just slapped me around the face because he said, dude, I don't understand where the confusion is. Your purpose is always very simple. It hasn't changed. It's always the same.

It's been as long the same as long as I've known you, and I think it will be the same until you take your last breath. It is about people. That is it. He said, where you're struggling is the tactical part of what comes next. What are you going to do with your time?

How are you going to kind of put people first? How are you going to put people at the core of what you do moving forward?

And genuinely, like, if I could have had that conversation with Michael somewhere in the region of April, my summer would have been a very different experience. A very different experience. But it comes to us when we need it, I guess at the moment it comes to us when we're ready for it.

And I just kind of sat and thought, he's right, you know, that's it. It's always it. It's always about people. It's always about putting people at the heart of what we do. So people on purpose.

It's going to be a three pronged attack. There you go. It's a three pronged attack. It's not an attack. That sounds insane. Why am I attacking the world? I'm not attacking the world.

Who's got the energy for that? It's going to be a three pound assault. That's what it's going to be.

Timothy R Andrews
00:31:36.090 - 00:31:37.830
That's so much better, Kieron.

Kieron Bailey
00:31:40.010 - 00:34:06.136
I've gone down the road now, so I'm on it. So there is going to be a podcast where I talk to people about their purpose, kind of how it connects to them how it connects to their family.

Because I think that's really interesting. My family was a shambles growing up. It was a real kind of messy affair. And I always think it's interesting to work out how those two things connect.

We're going to be talking about how purpose ties to ambition. I always thought I was an ambitious person. I'm not actually. I don't care about being number one.

I don't have a care about having the biggest house, about having a big fancy car. I enjoy my, my fabulous little electric car. It makes me happy. I don't need the biggest and best.

What I do want to do though is I do want to make a real impact on the world around me. So that's kind of that understanding that clarity for me was really important.

I want to kind of talk to some interesting people about what that looks like for them. Then there is the kind of the leadership development, the kind of stuff that I just love to do. I enjoy that kind of element. It's.

When I, when I was a restaurant manager, I wasn't really a restaurant manager, to be honest with you. I was a people developer. That was it. When I left Wagamama, there was 10% of their general managers started with me as team members.

That for me was a real source of pride. I want to have that impact on the world. So going out and communicating with the world and you know, I work with hotels, with casual dining.

Qsr one of the joys of my background is it's really diverse. I've done a lot of different things so I am able to communicate effectively with a lot of different people.

I realized earlier this year that I'm a multi potentialite, which sounds incredibly fancy, but really it's just a man who just likes lots of doodoos, lots of different things and he's pretty good at some of them. It's not amazing at any of them, to be honest with you, but he's able to tie them all together. That's for me. I'm all right with that, to be fair.

Modern day Renaissance man is what we're saying. And then the final part, which is kind of just popped into fruition this week, is it's going to be something called Pop Talks.

So there's going to be some small events, 50 or so people in a room, 20 minute speakers sharing some real passion, some real knowledge and something that we can learn from. Because if we're not learning while we're having these conversations, what is the point in life? What is the point? So people on purpose it's.

It's going to be noisy because it's really difficult for me not to be noisy, to be honest with you. It's kind of getting my. Built into my character, and. And it is the evolution of Kieran, to be fair. So I'm really excited. I can't wait.

Now I feel like I've got clear purpose now I feel like I've got a clear tactical path and a strategy to see what comes next. And, boom, off we pop.

So anybody's looking for some leadership development training from a ragingly noisy man who knows hospitality inside and out and loves it deeper with a care and a passion that is insane.

Timothy R Andrews
00:34:06.248 - 00:34:14.104
That's all for today from Kieron Bailey from People On Purpose. Thank you so much. Welcome back and best of luck with the future.

Kieron Bailey
00:34:14.272 - 00:34:16.920
Thank you so much, Tim. Thank you, Jerry. It's been an absolute joy.